You Can't Fix Stupid

My Uncle Bob sent me these and I just had to share them. Enjoy! posted by Ben.


One to tape to your medicine cabinet


Does this mean I'm still a teen too?


When there is absolutely no other news to report....


Our tax dollars at work.


Now that's just plain mean


Look closely - it says "We had no idea anyone was buried there"


I can just picture Abe Lincoln in a state-of-the-art civil war plane right now.


Now THAT's a good artist


A self-fulfilling prophecy?


As if lawyers don't have enough people to sue already.

My Favorite Mr Bean Scene - yes that rhymes.

I still remember laughing my butt off the first time I saw this. Have a merry Christmas everyone! posted by Ben.

Meredith's Solo with the KC Chorale

Meal Plan

Here it is for this week. Let me know if anyone wants recipes and I'd be happy to deliver.

Italian style lentil soup
Asian orange beef, rice
pork chops, mashed potato casserole, roasted green beans and tomatoes
chili, cornbread
moroccan-style pot roast (slow cooker), cous cous

*special- Truman's ozark pudding

I'm On TV

My choir was on TV last night. It was live and while I knew the camera was rolling I was smiling hoping that Ben would see me on camera. I could just see myself on there... lifting one eyebrow so demurely... and wouldn't you know all you get to see me is from the back. I'm wearing a green shirt. Anyway...the lady that is interviewed sings next to me so that's pretty close to me being on TV. :) Click here to see it.

Gwen Snoring Like a Chainsaw

Need I say more? Posted by Ben

Preston's Fav Christmas Song

Can anybody say choir nerd? :) Check out that dude's mustache!

A Hair Raising Scenario

Just to start out, this is an educational post. I went to the dermatologist this morning. Over the years I've been to many and they've given me thousands (ok, maybe 20) different shampoos and ointments and samples. You see, I have psoriasis of the scalp. This isn't contagious, but it is hereditary and I think I got it from my dad. For some reason doctors can't figure out, my immune system thinks there is something wrong and produces more skin than it should in certain areas on my scalp. Instead of making new skin every 28-30 days it's like 5-6 days. It's like dandruff except worse. There is no cure. Even me talking about it gives me the creeps. It showed up for me in 4th grade. I hope it never shows up for Gwen.

During pregnancy everything was hunky dory and it went away. Now that she's out of my body it has come back... and with a vengeance. Today the doctor prescribed some oil that I'm supposed to put on my head and wear a shower cap for three hours afterwards. Now, isn't that lovely and convenient? He also said that he's seen it where it can become like an armor on someone's scalp and their hair falls out. I asked him if that would happen to me and he said "there's no way to tell." NO WAY TO TELL????? Then I started thinking.... what would I do if THAT happened?

I've decided I'd get a wig. This is the one I've chosen for myself if that happens and I don't care if I'm 95.

Meal Plan for Week

chicken Parmesan and steamed veg
cube steak, asparagus, acorn squash
turkey lettuce wraps, brown rice
turkey burgers, oven fries
tacos and southwestern slaw
beef stuffed zucchini, cucumbers

Haystacks and Buttcracks

Today we got together with some family and baked Christmas cookies. I brought home enough cookies to give them out to every house on my street plus several others. We made a total of 5 different kinds of cookies: andies candies cookies, butterscotch haystacks, snickerdoodles, peanut butter cookies and coffee bean cookies. I tried to get everyone to put flour on their face for this photo... but surprisingly people were not so open to the idea! :)

from the left is my Mother-in-law, Pam, me, Ben's Aunt Dee and her daughter Joanna.


Gwen was held by so many people. She loved it. Here she is with Grandma.


Uncle John helped soothe her by putting on a wig. We got a kick out of that. I said she probably thinks she's being held by Cher.


The coffee bean cookies are supposed to have a little indention down the center of them like a real coffee bean. We joked and said they look like little butt cracks. Hence the name of this post.


Gwen found playing with the aluminum foil most enjoyable.


Our little eskimo.

Things To Come

This first photo is just for cute factor. Look how big she's getting! She's changing dramatically this month I think. She's got two little teeth coming up at the same time right now. They are like two little pearls on the bottom of her mouth. If you touch one of those gems though, it's like a razorblade. It's causing her a bit of discomfort. In this photo it looks like she's giving a weak thumbs up. :)


This is my feeble attempt at getting a picture of her teeth. It's impossible!


Tonight my wonderful mother-in-law, Pam, came over and watched Gwen while Ben and I had some time for a dinner by ourselves. Afterwards we went and did a bit of shopping. We had a lot of fun! Neither one of us are shoppers really, so what did we come back with you ask? Well... we bought a Christmas pinata! We saw it in a party store and we looked at each other and we knew we had to get it. It will be so much fun! I mean, really, when's the last time you bashed up Frosty for Christmas?



Last but not least, Gwen is quickly gaining strength in order to crawl. I can just see it now... her sailing across the room before I can blink my eyes.

Just For Fun

What do a jack-knifed semi in Ohio, a guy getting a divorce in Alabama, and a tornado in Kansas have in common? They're all fixin' to lose a trailer.

On his first trip to Boston, the North Carolinian met a girl at a bar and asked her, "Do you go to Harvard?" The girl responded, "Yale." "Okay. DO YOU GO TO HARVARD?!"

How do you know you live in Georgia? When all directions start with "go down Peachtree..." and include the phrase "when you see the Waffle House..."

Ben's Fav Christmas Song

Christmas Photos

The other day we had Christmas pictures taken. Here are some of them.




I love the arm rolls.

Tidbits Of Late

The other day I said to Ben "I'd like some time alone with you one of these days." He thought I said, "I'd like some tylenol with you one of these days."

Ben has gotten into the habit of saying "touché" all the time after I say something. I asked him to stop saying that... so now he catches himself about to say "touché" and he says "too true." I laugh and then he says "verily, verily I say unto you."

Time's Fun When Your Havin' Flies

Well... today we went out to the farm... to Grandma and Grandpa's house. Stuff just happens out there and it also feels like time stands still out there. I love the quiet and the wildlife. I was watching for turkeys, hawks, owls, blue herons, ect... but what I didn't think I would see was a deer right up against the glass of the window!! Of course, gullible me... I thought it was real for the first few seconds. It turns out Grandpa was having a little fun with us. It was the head of a deer he had shot during a hunt. (by the way, he butchers it all himself and they eat the meat)

Don't you just love this picture of Gwen and her Grandma? Grandma Pam went shopping today bright and early and bought Gwen a ton of clothes. Gwen's wearing one of the outfits in the picture. Beautiful!

Here's a video of Gwen eating this morning. I'm so proud of her progress in eating! She's learning. Next week it's going to be barley cereal...yum... :)

Ben's International Harvester Words

Just in case anyone is wondering "I wish I knew the words to International Harvester that Ben is singing".... here they are!
Ben


International Harvester
I’m the son of a 3rd generation farmer
I’ve been married fer years to a Walberg daughter
I’m a God fearin’ hard workin’ combine driver
Hoggin’ up the road on my p-p-p-p-plower
Chug a lug a luggin’ 5 miles an hour
On my International Harvester

Verse 1:
Three miles of trees on my tree farm.
Been mowing and trimming and come to no harm
There's Chinese Elms from across the street
That I used to hate, but sold anyway
To some poor sucker from out of state.

Verse 2:
One day we'll get a state paved road
Until that day I'll have dust in my throat.
But I can hunt and fish, and skin some deer
With Camouflage they don't see I'm here
I'll catcha a big ole' black snake
Even if it bites my hand
Cuz even if I'm bleedin to death
No snake is stayin here on my land.

Chorus:
Cuz I’m a son of a 3rd generation farmer
I’ve been married fer years to a Walberg daughter
I got 4 kids livin the Godly way
I’m a lifetime sponsor of the F.F.A.
Hay! That’s what I make
I make a lotta hay for a little pay
But I’m proud to say

I’m a God fearin’ hard workin’ combine driver
Hoggin’ up the road on my a p-p-p-plower
Chug a lug a lugin’ 5 miles an hour
On my International Harvester

Verse 3:
Well I built a green house for my wife
From plastic sheets and ole railroad ties
I didn't even spend a dime, savin' money for the farm
One day I might even sell the boats, takin' up space in my barn.

Meal Plan

Here it is for this week:

Mom's turkey meatloaf, zucchini parmesan crisps
southwestern slaw, tacos
lentil soup, rolls
makeover manicotti crepes, salad
Ellie Krieger's crispy chicken fingers, baked pot/ sweet pot

Thanksgiving 08

We have had a good day. God has been so good to us and I'm so thankful. Gwen was passed around like a football all day and didn't have a meltdown, we laughed a lot, ate a lot, and sang a lot. In my book that equals a fabulous time! Here are some videos that I took today during our talent show. (a Thanksgiving tradition started by Ben's grandparents)

This one is of Aunt Jo playing her accordion. She is playing "That's Amore."



This one is of my brother, Preston. I call the way he plays "slappy guitar." :) He's really talented.



and last but not least, my darling husband, Ben singing "International Harvester". He changed up the words to poke fun at his Grandpa. My favorite verse in the new version is "I'll catch a big ol' black snake even if it bites my hand, cause even if I'm bleedin' to death, no snake is stayin' here on my land."



a family photo. With Ben's turkey hat and my forced smile it's just great!


Ben's Grandpa reacting to Ben's song.

I have my Christmas tree up. It's beautiful. I have twinkling lights, meaning, they wink a little...but the only problem is that I have two strands of twinkling lights and one strand twinkles like a banshee while the other just twinkles slowly. Oh well...

A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words

He says he's going to wear it tomorrow to work. :)

Christmas Time Is (Almost) Here

Today my friend Sonia came over to help me decorate the Christmas tree. As she's from India, it was the first Christmas tree she's ever decorated. Since she's coming to Thanksgiving with us we decided to make some divinity today to bring along on Thursday. I've never made divinity...but something went wrong. This is what it's supposed to look like.

This was ours. :)

My mom gave me this tree and this will be the first Christmas that Ben and I have had a tree. Before, we just had a little decorative tree in our apartment with lights that stayed on it all year. When it came Christmas time I'd just plug it in. This tree requires effort. I couldn't figure out the complicated strands of lights and how they all hook up, so we got only a few strands actually to light. Something tells me Ben might be looking at the lights on the tree.

Sonia is expecting her first little one. I even "let" her change her first diaper today. (ain't I sweet ya'll?) Can you tell I've been watching that southern cook Paula Dean?

Here we are together. I took this shot with my arm extended.

Turkey Hat

Ben, Preston and I are thinking of wearing a turkey hat to Thanksgiving. (see pic of it above) For our talent we could do a fashion show of the hats and make them different. Any ideas? My idea was to put a tin foil bikini on one.

Gwen's First Meal

Originally I was going to wait until 6 months to start any real foods with Gwen...but here lately she has seemed so hungry when she wakes up at night. Maybe it's because she's teething (you can feel two teeth on the bottom gums now) but she has been hard to put back to sleep when she wakes at night. Last night she woke up at 1:30 and didn't go back to sleep until 3:30. I decided then and there that it was time to at least try the food and see how she likes it. I tried banana with her this morning. She spat it out every time, but I guess that's to be expected. I LOVE bananas, but Ben doesn't. Who doesn't like bananas? Anyway, she didn't really eat anything then and I didn't press the issue, but I thought it was cute. Ben worked from home today because we had our Christmas pictures made. I wanted him to see her eat for the first time.



This one is later on today. We tried rice cereal with breastmilk in there. I think she liked this better since it is the taste she is accustomed to. She is adorable and Ben is funny. (and adorable too!)

On Second Thought

In my attempt to retell a funny situation last night I may have come across like I was complaining about my stay at home status. The whole college degree statement and all. I just want to clear the air by saying that I am eternally and overwhelmingly happy that I am able to stay at home with Gwen. She is such a wonderful little girl and I would miss her desperately if I had to be away from her every day. So.. to answer some of your requests... ok, two of you asked for it... I give you another video of Gwen taken today.

Just Another Day In Paradise

Tonight Ben and I had a date night scheduled. Our plans included dinner at Chipotle and then wandering around Home Depot to get gift ideas for Ben. We got out the door and ate at Chipotle and we called once to see how things were going with Gwen... Ben's mom called us once after that and she was having a little meltdown... so we raced home. We got in the car and Ben said "that was really nice Meredith... all 20 minutes of it" and we both laughed. On the way home we get another call and Ben gets his phone out of his pocket and drops it in the floor board. I tell him to not kill us on the way home (I'm sweet huh?)... so about half a mile from home he pulls over and searches for his phone. I tell him that by the time he gets his phone we could already be home... so we just forget the phone and go on home. I'm thinking she will be having a meltdown when I get in.... only to find she has fallen asleep and that was the reason for the phone call on our way home. :) Oh well... Home Depot on another night it seems.

You may be wondering why I use ellipses so much... (by the way, those are the three dots) I just like them. You may also wonder how I have time to post twice in one day on here. Well... I consider this my link to the outside world really. I get out only briefly these days and the only adult conversations I get are, "oh, how old is your baby?" "is she sleeping through the night?" "She is sitting so nicely in her carrier... I'm so jealous" which is all fine and good... but I need some mental stimulation besides all that. I mean, I didn't get a college degree just to answer those two questions ya know?

Crescent Noon

Had enough Carpenters yet? Didn't think so... I had a cassette tape with this song on it. I still can't tell if she's singing "beer" November or not... but I love it anyways.

Merry Christmas Darling

My fav Christmas song.

Weekly Meal Plan

Here it is for this week. Let me know if you want a recipe. Leah, I still owe you the javanese chicken. I just want to add that I went to Aldi's today and found bread for $0.05!!

grilled sage shrimp, asparagus, corn
antipasta pizza, corn
turkey spaghetti casserole, salad
turkey enchiladas, steamed broccoli
slow cooker sloppy joes, carrots, salad

Thanksgiving (the part I'm responsible for)
cheesy grits- now, I know what you're thinking... GRITS?? These are good ya'll. I was asked to bring these last year by Ben's Grandma and I thought it was crazy to bring grits, so I told her no. Someone else brought them and they were the best thing there! I got the recipe for these that day. By the way, I ended up bringing a turkey and having to carve that thing almost made me swear off turkey for life.

double batch brownies- from a mix for ease

Swedish Knackebrod- these are rye crackers. I've never made these before. Lots of extended family are Swedish... and I want to get points with Ben's Grandma... especially after telling her no to the grits last year!

day after Thanksgiving- chili A bunch of us are bringing soups over the following day... I got elected to bring chili.

I can't wait until Thanksgiving!! Not because of the food, but because of the people. Ben has a large family, at least compared to mine and we all sit around playing cards, singing, talking, laughing at kids, and eating. I love the yearly talent show too. This year I'm helping a little boy sing through "Fifty Nifty United States."

Baby Thoughts

I'm reading a book from the library called "Let The Baby Drive" by Lu Hanessian. This one section I read today made me laugh. Maybe you all will get a kick out of it too.

When people told me life was going to change (when you have a baby), I'd balk, as if somehow I would be exempt from that fate. Your life, as you know it, will be gone forever, they'd foreshadow. And they cackled in that way voodoo witches tend to do when they are casting spells that don't rhyme and can't be undone. They said my whole focus would be different. In fact, and not to nitpick here, my entire center of gravity has shifted.

My senses have been sharpened. I can hear the baby's lips purse through the wall in another room. I can now see in the dark. My maternal sixth sense has been supplanted by a seventh: anticipating.

Also... here's a quote from Thomas Edison that is on my fridge. I read it today and thought... "hum... I'm looking forward to when Gwen can tell me goodnight and sleep right through."

"Life's most soothing things are a child's goodnight and sweet music." - Thomas A. Edison

Conversation With Gwen

For the most part, Gwen is pretty quiet during the day, but yesterday afternoon she decided to talk. Listening to this video I think my voice sounds like Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh. :)

Cornflake For Sale

I've been wondering how we are going to pay for plane tickets down to Alabama this Christmas and now I know. Today Gwen and I took a walk outside and afterwards I decided to make a pot of decaf coffee. While I was waiting for the coffee to brew I took out the boxes of cereal I bought at Aldi's yesterday and decided to taste them to see if they were any good. Aldi's is a discount grocery store and they don't have name brand cereals, so you never know. Anyway, I reach in a box and what did I pull out? Just the biggest corn flake I've ever seen is all!!!! I thought to myself... I'm selling this. Now... before you think I'm crazy, someone else has already sold a corn flake on ebay for $1,350. You can read about it here. Their corn flake they said was in the shape of Illinois... so I got to thinking... what could mine be?

The first country that came to mind was Aruba until I looked it up and it's just too slender of an island. Then I thought "what about Tobago?" Nope.. not the right shape either. Then I thought... what if I kick it British style and call it the Isle of Man? Yeah... the Isle of Man. So here is my corn flake in the shape of the Isle of Man.

Here's little Gwen with the cornflake just to give you some perspective of what a miraculous cornflake this really is.


I also found it's little brother corn flake in there. It's not as big as the Isle of Man one. Sigh... is anyone thinking I might need some friends? Any takers? HA! (don't worry... I've always been this way)

Meal Plan

Here's the meal plan for the week. Please let me know if you want a recipe and I'll send it your way. I shopped at Aldi's this week... saves LOTS of money.

Italian style chicken and dumplings
Turkey, sour cream mashed potatoes, garlic gravy, veg
chili
tacos and salad
spaghetti and salad
red pepper tilapia, baked potato, salad
javaneze chicken, jello cake- Pam and Preston's birthday

I Just Love Redneck Stuff

a Christmas tree made all from cans of Mountain Dew. That's a 2 liter on top. Awe inspiring isn't it?


Here it is lit. ps... someone else out there in internet land did this.. NOT ME!

Thoughts and A New Song

Today I had my massage. I normally wouldn't blog about this, but my thoughts during the massage were so random I thought it was funny. I had a hard time quieting my mind. There I was and the lady was massaging my feet and all I could think of was the topic of the sermon today... the lady that poured oil on Jesus' feet and wiped them with her tears and hair. Then I started thinking... I wonder what Jesus looked like. Then I thought... did Jesus have those tendril things on the side of his face? and how do the Jewish people get them to curl? What if you were a Jew that had naturally straight hair? would you get up every morning and curl those? and what are those for anyway? You see how STRANGE I really am now?

Tonight we started preparing Christmas music in choir. We are singing a song called "Some Children See Him" that I think the lyrics are really beautiful. I thought I'd share them.

Some children see Him lily white, the Baby Jesus born this night,
some children see Him lily white, with tresses soft and fair.
Some children see Him bronzed and brown, the Lord of heaven to earth come down;
some children see Him bronzed and brown, with dark and heavy hair.

Some children see Him almond-eyed, this Saviour whom we kneel beside,
some children see Him almond-eyed, with skin of yellow hue.
Some children see Him dark as they, sweet Mary's Son to whom we pray;
Some children see Him dark as they, and, ah! they love Him, too!

The children in each different place will see the baby Jesus' face
like theirs, but bright with heavenly grace, and filled with holy light.
O lay aside each earthly thing, and with thy heart as offering,
come worship now the Infant King, 'Tis love that's born tonight!

Cornucopia of Autumnal Splendor

Yesterday and today I was at a women's retreat at our church. It was good to get to know other women a little bit better. It's amazing hearing some of their stories. You just never know from the outside what people have been through. Here's a scripture that someone brought up during the retreat that I thought was beautiful.

Isaiah 40:11 "He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young."

When I got home Ben had bought me roses for our anniversary and also a card that made me cry. I thought we had agreed just to get cards for one another, but he arranged for me to have a massage tomorrow!! Do I have a great husband or WHAT? It's been a long time since I've had a massage.... it's going to be great. I felt bad because I just got him a card with two movie passes in it... oh, and I was given the movie passes. :)


At the ladies retreat I bid and won this cornucopia. Isn't it pretty?

Funny Bath Time

Yes, I know I filmed this wrong and you'll have to twist you head a little, but I think it's so cute and funny.

5 Years of Bliss

Tomorrow it will be five years that Ben and I have been married. The time has gone by so quickly and here I am typing with two little eyes watching me. It's amazing how life unfolds. How did I know Ben was the one for me? I always liked Ben... from the moment we met. Many of you know that we were friends for about a year before we ever dated. Since then there have been thousands of moments where I have felt so incredibly blessed to have Ben for a husband. How can I describe such an incredible and special person? He is so unique and funny and giving and just so much fun to be with. Here are a few examples of the millions (did I say thousands before?) of times I have praised the Lord that he is my partner for life...

The night a bunch of friends were playing charades and his thing he wrote in for someone to act out was "a jelly doughnut on a ferris wheel." Still crackes me up thinking of it.

praying together or him helping me put my new windshield wipers on or sharing our faith on campus together.

our first date when we went to Bangkok Bangkok and sat on little pillows on the floor.

him asking me to marry him after two months of dating... boy, was I shocked.

Our honeymoon in Rome. Incredible.

living through hurricanes, huge frogs at our door, mosquitoes, and dancing salsa in Miami.

moving via horse trailer to Missouri and then finally to Kansas.

me calling him at work and telling him the pregnancy test was positive and him making me go to the store to buy more and test again.

us seeing our baby Gwen for the first time.

him supporting me staying at home with Gwen.

PS... today Gwen and I took a walk outside and I put on a hat that I had bought her. Um... it's a little too big for her just yet, but I got a good laugh out of how it looks on her. I think it looks like a chef hat or something. See what I'd be missing if I wasn't home with her?

Historic Election

Gwen voted pro-life.

Grilled Shrimp

If you are like me, in the past you have not been sure if you like shrimp. Well... after making this recipe you will forever be a shrimp lover!! This is a very easy recipe and we love it.

3 cloves garlic, minced
1/3 C olive oil
1/4 C tomato sauce
2 T red wine vinegar
2 T chopped fresh basil (I use 1T dry)
1/2 tsp salt or salt substitute for the low sodium people out there like us
1/4 tsp cayenne pepper (or a little more if you like kick)
2 pounds fresh shrimp, peeled and deveined
skewers

In a large bowl, stir together the garlic, olive oil, tomato sauce, and red wine vinegar. Season with basil, salt, and cayenne pepper. Add shrimp to the bowl, and stir until evenly coated.

Cover, and refrigerate for 30 minutes to 1 hour, stirring once or twice.

Preheat grill for medium heat. Thread shrimp onto skewers, (I use metal skewers) piercing once near the tail and once near the head. Discard marinade.

Lightly oil grill grate. Cook shrimp on preheated grill for 2 to 3 minutes per side, or until pink all the way through. We serve ours with rice.

Weekend O' Fun

This weekend we have really enjoyed the weather. I just love fall time with the leaves and crisp air. I took these photos on Saturday. I think they are pretty with the leaves and the shadows. Notice the mouse in Gwen's pocket. The other day I used a gift card and bought a few clothes for her. Can you believe that I have never had to shop for clothes for her until now?


She's such a happy baby. (most of the time)


Today Gwen was dedicated at church. In the photo is Ben, our worship leader, and of course Ben and I. It was really special.


As a part of the dedication they gave us a certificate and a little pink New Testament with her name engraved on it. Here she is holding her first Bible.


Ok... meal plan for this week:

grilled pork chops, orzo w/ Parmesan and basil (made last night)
grilled shrimp, rice, and green beans (made tonight)
chicken merlot and curried cous cous
baked tilapia, cooked carrots, creamy broccoli with cashews
slow cooker beef stew
homemade pizza (didn't make it last week)

* special- strawberry tea cookies and I'm starting the 10 day Amish Friendship Bread starter to have for Thanksgiving time. :)

JUST VOTE

This is so cute! Everyone, let's make sure to vote.